Alexandra K. Traz

[Deleted]

Traz; Alexandra; Hagspawn

Name: Alexandra K. Traz

Nickname: Ally, Alcatraz

Age: 14

Gender: Female

Race: Weapon

Position: Student

Class: One Star

Partner: No partner yet

A Strong Body

Picture:

Appearance:
Physical Features: Ally is about 5' 6", a bit taller than your average 14 year old girl. She's pretty strong for her age, not so much in the arms, but more in the legs. Not that her arms are weak, but her leg strength is what's most impressive about her. This shows in her physical appearance, as she's shown to have prominent muscles in her arms and legs when any are visible. Her hair is a dull purple, and is usually kept at medium length, with her hair usually being bound in a short, spiky ponytail in the back. Her eyes are a fluorescent orange, and seem kind of droopy due to her constant drowsiness. She also has mildly tan skin.

Outfit: For her usual outfit, Ally wears a plain orange button-up shirt, along with a black outer jacket. She also wears a turquoise tie, as well as a silver chain necklace. She likes to wear jeans for pants, and hates wearing skirts or dresses of any kind, finding them too risky. The way she sees it, it's not worth a little extra leg comfort if it means someone might see your underwear. Because of this, she's usually on the bad side of every school with a school uniform requiring skirts for girls. Fortunately for her, Shibusen seems to be a bit more lenient on their school uniforms. Ally also likes to wear a plain black baseball hat. Also, because of her hobby of free-running, her hands are usually torn up from recklessly catapulting herself over obstacles, so she usually has bandages covering her hands, as well as various bandages all over her body.

Soul: When someone's scanning her soul for their personality, her soul is blue-violet in color, has a small smile, short hair, and has a chain with a lock wrapped around the top-right side of her hair, giving her a ponytail. When in battle, her soul seems slightly bigger than normal, but small enough to still fit within her frame. It is still blue-violet, and wrapped in chains with padlocks. One of the chains is open and sort of free floating on the right side if her soul, with the manacle open, making it sort if resemble a snake.

Height: 5' 6"

Weight: 128.5 lbs

Fighting Style:
When not using her weapon form, Ally's fighting style tends to reflect her hobby of free-running, as she uses her environment to her advantage, like jumping onto enemies from a high place, or swinging around a pole to tackle her opponent feet-first. She's also particularly good at wall-kicking, a technique that, while not originally created by her, was something she developed on her own nonetheless. She uses it to scale walls by kicking off one wall upwards, then landing on another one close by and kicking off, until she is as high as she wants, which she can use to hide and then ambush enemies. This, of course, needs two relatively parallel walls in order to utilize, as well as particularly powerful leg strength, which she has. In pure close-combat, Ally uses her legs and feet more often than her hands. With her partial weapon form, Ally spins her chain around from her shoulder, which can deflect certain projectiles as well as build up momentum for a particularly strong attack.

Personality:
Generally, Ally tends to be pretty serious in nature, walking around with a calm expression on her face, and is clearly tired most of the time It takes a lot to faze her, pretty much nothing less than a giant monster rising up from the ground right in front of her to get a startled expression on her face (not counting witches. Even the mere mention of witches can cause Ally to start sweating). She loves challenges, and an especially exciting or challenging mission is usually enough to put a rare grin on her face for a while. While she might seem to be the reckless-aggressive type at times, she's actually very observant, and would probably get higher grades in classes if she didn't sometimes fall asleep during class. Ally also tends to be a bit overdramatic in some cases, and will often resort to drastic measures even when there's an obviously easier way, like suggesting cutting off a tongue in order to avoid tasting terrible food. She hates stereotypes about girls, and will fight anyone who says something about her being just a weak girl, or, you know, things like that.

Ally doesn't usually like to work with others, simply because of her secluded childhood. Now that she's allowed to have friends, she's starting to become better at cooperating, but still prefers to go solo in a fight. Even when fighting with her meister, she initially prefers to just fight in human form with her meister, and will only go into full-weapon form if she has to. When by herself, Ally prefers to go free-running, and if she can't do that, she usually likes to train and exercise. If even that isn't possible, she isn't against just sitting down and reading a book, although she'll usually fall asleep after a while. When in a particularly challenging fight, Ally's personality sometimes takes a turn toward madness, and she has a manic grin on her face the entire time just from the sheer exhilaration of fighting. She'll often mock enemies repeatedly, and seems to be going insane, which isn't far from the truth, given her hagspawn soul. Even with her insanity, though, she still uses her surroundings in a sort of graceful yet off-kilter way, catching opponents off-guard with various free-running techniques.

Ally has a certain quirk aside from all that. For one, Ally's always frequently tired, which causes her to take naps throughout the day. The reason of this isn't too clear, as there were no physical anomalies that doctors could find, but her psychologist diagnosed it to be some type of mental trauma attributed to waking up and seeing her mother die, making her unconsciously hate being awake. That's his speculation, anyway. She has a doctor's note explaining her need to sleep, and thus doesn't get into trouble for falling asleep during class. This bad habit isn't helped by the fact that she usually expends all her energy whenever she goes out free-running, which usually causes her to fall asleep the moment she gets home. Surprisingly enough, though, when she isn't sleeping, she is particularly alert, and reacts to things much more quickly than most people. Something else of note is that, despite her apparent tomboy personality, she is a little sensitive about her looks, and will get angry or depressed if someone criticizes her outfit or features, depending on who it is.

Inside the Soul

Weapon form: Ally's weapon form is basically what I like to call a "Prison Chain". However, she could simply be referred to as a Demon Chain as her type of weapon. What it basically consists of is a black metal chain, like the ones used in old prisons with the metal clamps on the ends that would clamp around a prisoner's wrists or ankles. It can be used either with both manacles clamped around the meister's wrists, or just one. For just one manacle, it can be used in the same way that Ally uses her partial form. With both manacles on, all the meister's spiritual abilities are increased in strength. This includes Soul Purge or Perception, as well as any other soul-related powers that the meister might have. Due to Ally's hagspawn soul, her weapon form is more flexible than others, meaning the chain itself can stretch between eight feet and four inches, with the latter acting more like a pair of handcuffs. The manacles can grow bigger or smaller as well, from 2 inches in diameter to 12 inches. It can be noted that her manacles can be opened or closed at will, as easily as clenching or unclenching her normal hand.

Partial Form: Ally's partial form is her right arm transformed into the chain. She can manipulate the chain directly from the part touching her human form, so that she can spin it from her shoulder if need be. While the chain can still extend and shorten, she can't maneuver it as easily if it's any longer than her normal arm.

Abilities:

Snake Shot: In partial weapon form, Ally grows her manacle to 6 inches in diameter, then swings her chain arm around with her other arm, like a ball-and-chain. She then throws it forward at high speed and elongates it, and at this point she has two options. She can either keep the manacle shut and use a fairly strong blunt attack, or open it to clamp around a part of the opponent's body, either in the normal around-the-limb fashion or by clamping very painfully down on a certain part of the opponent's body, like a snake biting its prey. This technique can also be used as a grappling hook of sorts to latch onto far away objects or rooftops.

Unbound Soul: The technique used on the meister when he/she is wearing the chain on their wrists. The meister's soul power is doubled, making for an extremely powerful Soul Purge or Soul Perception (or any other spiritual abilities the meister has). During this, the meister becomes more susceptible to madness. It lasts for about 5 posts at a time, and can only be used 3 times per thread. This can't be used at the same time as Soul Chain.

Soul Chain: Ally has a special wavelength that allows her to disable the soul abilities of a target, called a Binding Wavelength. This wavelength can be used when the chain is wrapped around an opponent and is attached to the meister. The meister can channel the soul wavelength through the chain, and upon hitting the enemy through the chain, it temporarily binds their soul, stopping them from using any soul related attacks, like an involuntary version of a witch's Soul Protect. Using this is very exhausting for the meister and weapon, and can be resisted by someone who has a stronger soul than Ally or her meister. It can last for about 2-3 posts, and could be used twice per thread. It can't be used at the same time as Unbound Soul.

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Resonances: None so far

Out of your Mind

Strengths:
1. Physically Fit
2. Strategic Mindset
3. Very Good Reflexes

Weaknesses:
1. Susceptible to Madness
2. Lack of Stamina
3. Psychologically Weak

Hobbies: Ally likes to do any activity as long as her body is moving, but she's particularly into free-running. Free-running is basically running throughout a city and going over or dodging any obstacle in your way. When she's not doing that, she prefers to be sleeping somewhere.

Likes:
1. Thunderstorms
2. Physical activity
3. Snakes
4. Sleeping

Dislikes:
1. Witches
2. Studying
3. Wearing skirts
4. Being used in full weapon form, as she feels she can do more when she's physically fighting

Aspirations:
Ally wants to become a death scythe, of course, and she'd also like to make as many friends as she can at this school. She'd also like to one day create and own one of the best prisons in the world. Despite her wiccaphobia, she also wants to take revenge on her grandmother for killing her mother.

History:
Ally was born to a loving mother and father in San Francisco, California. They decided to name her the way they did because of her dad's fondness of the old prison, despite its shifty past. Her mother was a hagspawn meister, with a gecko as a familiar, and was capable of using minor regeneration spells. Her father was a chain weapon like Ally, as well as a detective for the local police, and as such Ally grew up learning about forensics, as well as various detective techniques, which likely is what caused her calm, observational personality to take form. She also frequently heard of the horrendous crimes that were committed by people (which also might have led to her serious nature).

At age five, Ally's grandmother (a 600 year old witch, not looking a day over 30) rounded up all of her living ancestors to start a mini-coven of her own, including Ally's mom and Ally, along with a few other family members that were still alive. Ally's mom refused to go with her, which resulted in a showdown between Ally's grandmother and her parents. In the end, Ally's grandmother was badly wounded in the fight, and fled, but returned later to their house at night. Ally woke up after hearing a noise and witnessed her grandmother killing her mother, laughing maniacally the whole time. Ally promptly fainted, and her father came out then, but the witch managed to escape a second time. This whole ordeal is where Ally's wiccaphobia comes from, and is also likely where her sleeping illness is from. So from age five, Ally was basically raised by her father, and, due to the loss of her mother and her father's own run-ins with horrible crimes, was kept home and close to him as often as possible.

With nothing better to do, Ally began reading books and exercising in her free time. Seven years later, Ally's hagspawn/weapon soul revealed itself when a bully at school beat Ally within an inch of her life with a lead pipe, and she ended up nearly killing him with her newly-developed chain arm before her father arrived to stop her. Now, Ally had even more restrictions from her father, but in a rebellion against him, she started to sneak out at night to take up a practice she read about called "free-running".

Every night she would go out and run throughout the city, and occasionally beat up the average creep every once in a while. As a result, she would come back with some scratches and bruises, but she was surprisingly never noticed by her father until she was 14, when he finally did notice, and since he knew it would be hard to completely stop her from going out, he sent her off to Shibusen in order to get her to learn how to fight properly.

Extra Notes: First of all, makeouts are sloppy. Second of all, if Ally had been a full witch, it would be more apparent, but her familiar is a snake, which unfortunately was the same type of familiar as Medusa, but it really can't be helped given the similarities between snakes and Ally's abilities (the chain itself kinda resembles a snake, and the Soul Chain ability sort of resembles venom). Also, Ally's theme song is Zoro's Theme, from One Piece (Mini Theme+Theme 1=General Theme; Theme 2=Emotional Theme; Theme 3=Fighting Theme).

Behind the strings

Alias: Alcatraz

Other characters: None

Face Claim: None, as I used Character Makers for now.

RP Sample:
Everything else was gone. All that mattered was the path in front of her, and how to deal with it. The wind whistled past her ears as she rushed through Death City at nighttime. Something was coming up ahead... a short fence, probably 3 feet tall, easy enough to get over. The moment she reached it, she planted her palms between the wooden points and flipped herself over, landing gracefully on her feet on the other side without skipping a beat. She peered at a vague shape in the darkness before her. She had to understand what her obstacle was quickly or risk breaking her stride. It almost looked like- Suddenly, the object blurred further, and her right eye began to sting.

"Aw, dammit! My freakin' eye..."

She raised her hand to rub the sweat out of her eye, and slammed straight into a tall, metal lamppost, blacking out for a second. When she came to, she was staring up at the night sky, and that creepy moon was laughing at her, a little blood dripping from its mouth. She groaned and gently touched her nose, recoiling instantly and wincing in pain. She forced herself to touch it again, and this time when her hand came off, she could see her fingers had blood on them.

"Crap, is it broken?"

She slowly stood up, and dusted herself off. Thank Shinigami-sama that she hadn't hurt anything other than her nose, like her leg, or she could've been in real trouble. Aside from some scratches and a bruise on the back of her head, her nose seemed to be the only seriously damaged part of her body. She picked up her fallen hat, and placed it squarely on her head. She looked around and tried to get a grip on her surroundings. She had somehow ended up on the street-side after running through those yards. And judging from how long it took to get to this spot, it would take about half an hour more to get back to her dorm, if her adrenaline high held out. But that wasn't likely, as she had already started to calm down, and at this rate she might fall asleep before she even made it back.

Ally looked down at her right hand, still dripping blood. She could afford to cheat this time, just a little, given the situation. She transformed her right arm into the chain and manacle, grabbed it with her other hand, and began to spin it around like a lasso. She started running, then jumped and released the chain expertly towards a rooftop, elongating it as it flew until the manacle clamped down on the edge of the rooftop, then shortened it until it was only a foot in length, so that it pulled her up. Ally took a moment to catch her breath, then maneuvered herself up onto the roof. It would be a bit more risky up here, but it was a lot quicker than moving on the ground, and it wasn't as if she'd never done this before. She took off, running and leaping over gaps towards the outline of the dorm buildings in the night sky.
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[Rylux]

Alright I was pretty worried when I saw hagspawn but this isn’t the horror I expected. It still needs some work but it is salvageable. So let’s begin~

Height/Weight: According to the height weight chart used as a standard she is underweight for her height and she is also rather tall for her age. I’d say up her weight to 125 or so to make her more average in that regard.

Soul: I’m gonna have to say no to the battle description of her soul. People with souls that big are usually pretty powerful, that’s why Maka was so shocked when she saw Stein’s soul was that big. I’m also saying no to the red-violet coloration of her soul at times but more on that later.

Personality: ” She'll often mock enemies repeatedly, and almost seems on the verge of madness, which isn't far from the truth, given her hagspawn soul. However, beneath the insanity, she's subconsciously observing her environment and the best way to use it,”
This is a tad contradicting. If she was simply battle crazed this may be tolerable but given her witch heritage she is likely to be effected by the sway of madness so she would be dealing with actual insanity.

Weapon Form: There is no need for the example of use so please remove that (or at least the whole “A good example is from Naruto” part) If you wish to keep the example please hide it with the proper codes text text text

The manacles changing size is another issue but I will get to that later.

Abilities: Here is where the main issues come up.

-Slammer Gun: I don’t have much issue with this except for the length of the chain and the fact that her fist would get hurt regardless of what she hit with it. Weapons are incredibly difficult to injure in weapon form, because her hand is not transformed it would still take damage as if she was a normal human hitting her hand with that much force.

-Binding Wavelength: Please remove any information that is for the future, it makes it easier to read and review that way. That being said I would recommend just removing the ability completely or at the least bringing it down a lot.
She would not be able to use this unless wielded by a meister and being wrapped around an opponent. When used it could paralyze the target temporarily OR lock their soul abilities temporarily. Of course this can be increased and expanded upon later as she grows stronger.

-Anima Prime: I’m sorry but this simply will not work for a number of reasons. Firstly she is a hagspawn, and according to you she is the child of another hagspawn. That would make her ¼ witch an ¾ human. Transformation is an ability witches possess due to the malleable nature of their souls, humans lack this. Being more human than witch Ally would not be able to transform to this extent. Now as far as hagspawn abilities go I have some suggestions that may help you get a better idea.
-Magic imbued wavelength: Her wavelength can have some magic properties to it that could allow for some minor magic traits to be accessed via resonances. This could take the place of or alter her binding wavelength.
-Flexible weaponry: Normally weapons are a pure solid form with no flexibility (swords don’t grow longer, guns don’t curve) with her weapon form and hagspawn blood we can work around this. Normally I would ask for a constant length of her chain but if you decide to go this route I instead ask for two lengths, a minimum and a maximum, and she could elongate or shrink to those limits instead of remaining at one constant length.
-Flight: With this she could allow herself and /or her meister the ability to fly. Suspicious and not the most fitting of her weapon form but an option.
-Minor Spells: Simple spells that could give her the edge in combat but this comes with its own set of problems.
--Magical theme: She would need to go with a magical theme for these spells and because you stated her mother was inclined to a gecko she would follow suit, regeneration spells and all. Now this would allow her to negate the sway of madness that all witches have and therefore be less suspicious in Shibusen but it takes away the opportunity for extra offense that you seem to be going for.

Strengths/Weaknesses: This section is for constant battle strengths and weaknesses and most people have issues here. I recommend looking at other accepted profiles for an idea of what is desired. Right now your first strength works but all the others do not. Likewise only her last weakness fits this criteria while the others do not. If you need help look at other profiles and/or look in the Information section for a helpful guide.

RP sample: Please alter the format a bit so it is easier to read. Simple things like double spacing for text and adding a color to the character’s text would help a lot.
Also implement the changes to her partial form to this and perhaps change the situation. There is nothing inherently wrong with it but it is overdone, plus a NOT student taking out a random Shibusen student who may have been One star is a little preposterous.

Advice: Like I said earlier there are a few major tweeks that need to be made but if you take care of those you’ll have a wonderful character who looks like she would be interesting to rp with and see grow. With the above advice in mind here are my suggestions for the more complex parts to help with a speedy acceptance~

-Weapon form: Shackles/manacles work but let’s see how to improve them.
--Give them a set length/length range: Perhaps from 2 feet of chain to 5 feet of chain.
--Battle usefulness: Trying to kill a kishin with the chain is doable but seems harder than necessary. An idea is you could have her latch onto her meister’s wrist and increase their soul abilities while worn. This would give them a larger range with soul perception or allow them to use an enhanced soul purge to do more damage or even kill a kishin.

Another idea off of this is increasing the meister’s physical abilities like speed and strength. It would still be hard to kill a kishin but this could help them get the chain to a vital spot. Or you could just purchase this as an upgrade later on.

--Partial form: There is nothing wrong with your partial form but if you wanted one that did not damage her as much you could transform her right hand into the manacle part to restrain a target while she or her meister attack them.

-Abilities: This is the part that I think may be hardest.

--Binding Wavelength: Keeping this as a toned down version to power up later is fine by me~ If you did a possible upgrade may be letting her meister tap into it for paralyzing soul purges.

--Anima Prime/Hagspawn blood: Scrap anima prime, that be witch abilities far outside the level of a ¼ hagspawn. Personally I would go for the flexibility offered by the witch blood to gain the size modification to your weapon form. I understand this will require some altering in her history and such but it will benefit her more as a weapon.

-Strengths/Weaknesses: For lack of any concrete advice all I can offer is THIS link to help give you ideas.

And as far as a character speech color THIS link might help you pick one, most people go with the color of their character’s souls.

On another note I would like to ask about your rank. You have Ally down as a NOT student and I just want to make sure you are aware of what that entails. As a NOT class student she would need to find a meister and take 5 NOT mission before moving to One star level. This seems unnecessary as Ally seems fully capable of fighting. If you still want her to be NOT class that is fine but I think she could be One star if you want.

If you have any questions about anything feel free to send me a PM, ask in the cbox, or post a thread in the Help board and I will assist in any way I can. I look forward to seeing this character completed~

[Deleted]

Sorry, I said I'd get it to it sooner, but in my defense I had a ton of homework to catch up on after my week vacation. Aaaaanyways...

Height/Weight: Made her shorter and a bit heavier in accordance with a
H/W chart on the Internet.

Soul: What I was going for was the battle version of their soul that everyone seems to have, even Maka (when she was battling Free in the anime, and her Grigori Soul became visible briefly). This one's just a bit bigger than Maka's was, but still fits within the frame of her body. I could probably just scrap it if you want though.

Personality: Edited, hopefully so it's clear she's insane when fighting now.

Weapon form: I scrapped the example, and added in the Soul boosting powers, along with the flexible weaponry.

EDIT: Got to my computer, so I'll try and finish this up.

Slammer Gun (now Snake Shot): Changed it to a slightly different technique. Hopefully this one's fine.

Binding Wavelength: I scrapped the body paralysis and made it so that she can use the soul chain ability slightly now, and linked it to her Soul boosting ability. I hope that's fine, and that it's not to OP for a One Star.

Anima Prime: Scrapped it, and replaced it with the flexible weaponry stuff, which is pretty cool in its own right.

Strengths and Weaknesses: I think that I've edited it to be passable, but quick question: what does psychologically weak mean? Does it mean open to manipulation, like from madness or a manipulative guy, or just plain dumb? I'll probably keep it regardless, but I just wanted to know.

RP sample: Hopefully I've done a better job on it now. I gave her dialogue some fancy colors, and double spaced the dialogue as well. My excuse for it is that I was typing that part up pretty late, so I dont think I was really thinking straight. For the record, the guy she punched was, yeah, supposed to be in NOT class, but I didn't really make that clear...

As for her originally being NOT class, I just thought that if a weapon didn't have a meister or vice versa, they had to go there to find one. But if you think that she's ready for One Star, than that sounds good to me! Just need to find a meister...

I think that's it for now. Gonna take off the WIP now.

[Rylux]

Well you do look much better but there are a few things that still need work.

Binding Wavelength: This would be a passive ability. Also the wavelength itself wouldn’t be able to boost her meister’s abilities.

Unbound Soul: This could double the powers of her meister at most. It would not alter their appearance but it would make them more susceptible to madness. This would probably last for about 5 post each. Probably about 3 uses per thread.

Soul Chain: At current this would probably last for about 2-3 turns on an average opponent. Using this would be very tiring for both her and her meister and probably only be usable 2 times per thread.

History: Remove the mention of immortality. It is unnecessary considering the lifespan of witches and best to not have immortality in relation to you.

She looks good just that as a starting weapon her abilities would not be strong, even if she is in the One star class.

[Deleted]

Alright, I think I've got it all edited.

[Rylux]

Alright everything looks good. Though I would like you to tweak two last things. Please just add this to her profile.

Binding Wavelength: Alexandra has a special wavelength that allows her to disable the soul abilities of a target. It requires being wielded by a meister to be used currently.

Soul Chain: Make it so the target must have the chain wrapped around them for use or the clamp be attached to them and her meister.

Just take care of these things and she will be all good to go!

[Deleted]

Dang it, I knew I was forgetting something. I basically just deleted the binding wavelength section in abilities, since the Soul Chain pretty much explained it all, but forgot to add in the part about it being her special soul's wavelength, so I've added it into the Soul Chain part. And I put in the part about wrapping around the opponent and being wielded by a meister into Soul Chain too. So hopefully now I've managed to fix it up right.

[Rylux]

Thank you for making the changes! Ally is all good so feel free to start rping at anytime now~